300 Short Dirty Jokes

Joke 21

Q: What’s the difference between oral and anal sex?

A: Oral sex makes your day, Anal makes your hole weak.

Joke 22

Q:  What’s a man’s definition of a romantic evening?

A:  Sex after Blowjob.

Joke 23

Q: What’s the difference between your boyfriend and a condom?

A: Condoms have evolved over time, they’re not so thick and insensitive anymore.

Joke 24

Q: What do tofu and a dildo have something in common?

A: They are both meat substitutes.

Joke 25

Q: What’s the difference between a lentil and a chickpea?

A: I’ve never had a lentil on my face. (chickpea: Chick-Pee)

Joke 26

Q: What did the banana say to the vibrator?

A: Why are you shaking? She’s gonna eat me!

Joke 27

Q: What’s the difference between a G-spot and a Golf Ball?

A: A guy will succeed in finding a golf ball.

Joke 28

Q: What’s the difference between being hungry and being horny?

A: Where you put your cucumber.

Joke 29

Q: What do girls and noodles have in common?

A: They both wiggle when you eat them

Joke 30

Q: What’s the difference between a hockey player and a hippie chick?

A: The hockey player takes a shower after three periods.

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Joke 31

Q: What’s the difference between your wife and your job?

A: After ten years, your job will still suck.

Joke 32

Q:  How is exercise effective for a man on the beach?

A:  Because he sucks his stomach every time he sees a bikini.

Joke 33

Q: Why does it take 100 million sperm to fertilize one single egg?

A: Because none of the sperm will stop and ask for directions.

Joke 34

Q: How are men similar to diapers?

A: They’re usually full of crap, but thankfully disposable.

Joke 35

Q: What does one saggy boob say to the other saggy boob?

A: If we don’t get any support, people will think we’re nuts.

Joke 36

Q:  Why did God create orgasms’?

A:  So women can moan even when they’re happy.

Joke 37

Q:  What’s the difference between your bonus and your dick?

A:  You don’t have to constantly beg a woman to blow your bonus.

Joke 38

Q: What’s another name for a vagina?

A: The box a penis comes in.

Joke 39

Q: Who was the world’s first farmer?

A: Eve, because she made Adam’s banana grow bigger.

Joke 40

Q: Why doctors suggest penis for breakfast?

A: Because it has a mushroom head, a hotdog, two eggs and cream, which provides all the nutrients necessary to make a woman healthy.

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