200 Best Clean Jokes

Joke 151

Q: Why do some people eat snails? 

A: It seems that they don’t like fast food.

Joke 152

Q: What do smart blondes and UFOs have in common? 

A: You always hear about them but you never see them.

Joke 153

Q: What has one horn and gives milk?
A: A milk truck.

Joke 154

Q: How many tickles does it take to make an Octopus laugh? 

A: Ten-tickles.

Joke 155

Q: Why don’t blind people skydive?

A: Because it scares the crap out of their dogs.

Joke 156

Q: What has a face and two hands but no arms, legs, or a body?

A: A clock.

Joke 157

Q: What did one toilet say to the other? 

A: You look flushed.

12-Minute Affiliate

Joke 158

Q: What’s the difference between a jeweller and a jailer?

A: A jeweller sells watches and a jailer watches cells.

Joke 159

Q: Why is Basketball such a messy sport?

A: Because you dribble on the floor!

Joke 160

Q: Why did the soccer player bring string to the game?

A: So he could tie the score.

Joke 161

Q: What did the nose say to the finger? 

A: Quit picking on me!

Joke 162

Q: Why do blondes always smile during lightning storms? 

A: They think their picture is being taken.

Joke 163

Q: Why did Johnny throw the clock out of the window?
A: Because he wanted to see time fly!

Joke 164

Q: What is an astronaut’s favourite place on a computer?

A: The Spacebar!

Joke 165

Q: What did the green grape say to the purple grape? 

A: “Breathe, man! Breathe!”

Joke 166

Q: How do you communicate with a fish?

A: Drop him a line!

Joke 167

Q: What’s a balloon’s least favourite type of music? 

A: Pop.

Joke 168

Q: What concert costs 45 cents?
A: 50 Cent featuring Nickleback.

Joke 169

Q: What do you call a sheep with no head and no legs?

A: A cloud!

Joke 170

Q: Why do Blondes have TGIF written on their shoes? 

A: To remind themselves that toes go in first.

Joke 171

Q: Did you hear about the blonde who gave her cat a bath?

A: She still hasn’t gotten all the hair off her tongue.

Joke 172

Q: What do you call a fake noodle?

A: An Impasta

Joke 173

Q: What do you call a three-footed aardvark?

A: A yardvark!

Joke 174

Q: Why did the tree go to the dentist?
A: To get a root canal.

Joke 175

Q: Where do sheep go to get haircuts?
A: To the Baa Baa shop!

12-Minute Affiliate