200 Best Clean Jokes

Note: This Post – 200 Best Clean Jokes may comprise jokes that may offend you, therefore reader’s discretion is highly advised. Jokes in Funnyjokes123.com are for entertainment purpose only. These Clean Jokes do not intend to harm, criticize or insult any nationalities, tribes, groups, genders and ages.

Joke 1

Q. What is the worst combination of two sicknesses?

A. Diarrhoea and Alzheimer. You’re running, but you don’t know where.

Joke 2

Q: What’s the difference between a knife and a woman arguing?

A: A knife has a point.

Joke 3

Q: Why are hurricanes normally named after women?

A: When they come they’re wild and wet, but when they go they take your house and car with them.

Joke 4

Q: Why do so few men end up in Heaven?

A: They never stop to ask directions.

Joke 5

Q: Why doesn’t matter how often a married man changes his job?

A: He still ends up with the same boss.

Joke 6

Q: How do you keep your husband from reading your e-mail?

A: Rename the mail folder “Instruction Manuals.”

Joke 7

Q: Why did God create man before woman?

A: He didn’t want any advice.

Joke 8

Q: Why did the man throw the clock out the window?
A: Because he heard time flies. 

Joke 9

Q: Can February march? 

A: No, but April may. 

Joke 10

Q: Why are Saturday and Sunday so strong? 

A: Because the rest of the days are Weakdays. 

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Joke 11

Q. What is the difference between a battery and a woman?

A. A battery has a positive side.

Joke 12

Q: Why are women like clouds?

A: Eventually they go away and it’s a good day.

Joke 13

Q: What do you call a woman with an opinion?

A: Wrong.

Joke 14

Q. What does a house wear?

A. Address.

Joke 15

Q: What has eight arms and an IQ of 60? 

A: Four guys watching a football game.

Joke 16

Q: Why did the girl bring a ruler to bed? 

A: She wanted to see how long she slept. 

Joke 17

Q: “Dad, are you all right?” 

A: “No, I’m half left and half right.” 

Joke 18

Q: Did you hear about the blonde who stood in front of a mirror with her eyes closed’?

A: She wanted to see what she looked like asleep.

Joke 19

Q: How Is a man like a used car?

A: Both are easy to get, cheap, and unreliable!

Joke 20

Q. What do you call an American Bee?


Joke 21

Q. Which table fits in the fridge?


Joke 22

Q: What book do women like the most?

A: This is “Their husband’s chequebook!”

Joke 23

Q: Why don’t skeletons ever go Prom Night? 

A: Because they have no body to go with. 

Joke 24

Q: What did one eye say to the other eye? 

A: “Between you and me, something smells.” 

Joke 25

Q. Which bus never drove any street?

A. The globus.

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